Dream Journal

 I dreamt of you.

We were in that room 

Writing music together 

You were trying to fix something in Cubase 

I thought it was hot

I just loved how you kept going 

Your problem solving skills 

Your patience 

You blew me away with every idea 

The way you would explain everything to me 

... 

I miss that room so much

It was one of the most beautiful things in my life

It wasn't just music 

It was so much more 

It was you... 

I will miss you forever... 

As I am writing these words I can hear clearly in my mind your guitar softly playing the intro from one of those songs we tried to make together (key word: "Ψάξε" 🎶...) (*) 

We never took pictures 

But I still have it all in a hard drive

Our pictures of sound 

How we were creating together 

How timid I was trying to follow your lead 

I wanted to please you 

(I guess I didn't stand a chance

I never was what you usually go for and I knew it) 

I was already wounded 

I know you will never understand 

I guess it wasn't as big of a deal for you 

I don't understand, either... 

If I had said no back then 

Maybe my love wouldn't be weighing you down now... 

It wouldn't be a problem 

I'm sorry 

We all do life without rehearsal

We all do it for the very first time 

I should have known

I was pure and waiting for something 

I was waiting for you to happen 

And you did 

My thirst was not music

My success never has been fame 

I was hoping to find you

I can remember us giggling and trying to bring two different worlds of sound together 

To understand each other's viewpoints in life 

You were my one and only... 

I wish you had treated me better... 

I trusted you... with my life

Why... 

I just needed to be treated like a human being ... you know? 

Why did you have to shock me as bad 

Become somebody else... 

I adored you 

And unfortunately... 

I still do. 

(*) I'm singing it to myself today 

To find my lost hope 

I remember the verses 

I sing it alone sometimes 

I can't listen to those recordings 

It's too painful for me 

But I can still hear them in my head

As if you are sitting next to me right now 

Playing your guitar 

... 

You didn't know it back then

But you wrote this song for me, now...