Laminar Flow

 Me helping my mother whenever she has a moment of weak health

-Which to be fair does not happen that often- 

Because it is not serious, it gives me time to ponder

Brings out a fear of impending doom for me 

In a sense that I fear, reaching her age 

Having noone around to help me at my weakest hours

On the other hand, knowing that we are all utterly alone when facing the biggest moments of our lives

Lightens that false loaded preconception that being with a family of your own creation always means support at your weakest moments...

Because life doesn't work this way. 

We are all fundamentaly alone and any hand that stretches itself to care for us is beyond our control...

Caring for someone,genuinely, no matter who they are to you... Is supposed to be an act of pure affection.

It is a spontaneous occurance. 

And that may either come from any direction in life, or not at all, no matter who you live with, sleep with, no matter who you raise... 

If a hand is meant to hold yours in the time of your need 

It will. 

And if not... 

It won't. 

Because so many people, working in facilities for elderly people say that they do have families but none of them visit... 

So I guess, one can never know what awaits 

One can never prepare well enough

And as scary as that sounds 

I can find some sort of peace in this conclusion. 

We are no better than any other man or woman who stepped on this earth before us. 

I guess in a sense everything is intimately natural... Everything... And I can find some sort of safety knowing that. 

There is something unseen and delicate we often take for granted in our day to day lives, gently stepping in every single second, supporting us... Supporting life and all of our seasons in it... 

I find great comfort whenever I connect with it

Living alone, I have decided to rest my fate, my entire life unfolding, my seasons into the hands of God. 

Whatever is meant for me, will be. 

And I am OK with this. 

I am at peace with it. 

Everything is natural and I am part of everything. 

So be it. (Whatever that may be...There's only one way to find out what our story through this world was, after all... To live through every little part of it!) 

Cheers to life! 

Source 📸

The day I was born... 

The moon was full... 

Nothing was missing from it. 

It was whole.